Welcome to the eleventh class ,
This class is all about your inner beauty. Much of how you feel has to do with your chemistry. It can make you feel on top of the world, or it can make you so depressed that you have no desire to even get out of bed.
What I want you to really take in is how much control you have over your chemistry, and consequently, your level of happiness. When you’re happy, your energy shows it, and you are beautiful, in the true sense of that word. When your energy is exuding your inner beauty, you are making magic. That’s because your Woman Energy, your glow, magically impacts everyone with whom you interact. Magic…
Your Inner Beauty
Stand Up Straight and Smile
Mother Teresa once said, “Every time you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person…a beautiful thing.”
Ask a man what he thinks is attractive about a woman and you’ll find good posture and a smile on his list. So smile…readily, and infectiously, with your whole face, even your entire body, not just your mouth.
Smiling is the best, quickest, easiest thing you can do to bring about magic. It’s the best door-opener there is. It almost always encourages others to smile back at you for no other reason than you make them feel happy, if only for those few moments.
When you can make magic with an authentic smile, that emanates from your heart, others want to be around you. That’s because the magic of an open, happy heart is in short supply. But you can add that much needed magic wherever you go.
Because this section is about your Inner Beauty, it might seem out of place for me to be talking about smiling and posture. But you already know how important your energy is in making magic.
For your smile to be authentic, it must come from within you, from your joy at being you. And if you are happy to be you, then you will not slouch. You will stand tall, be proud, and let your heart exude all that beautiful, magical love.
When you have good posture, it sends out a signal, literally, that you have self-respect, self-confidence, and feel good about yourself. Besides shutting off your heart energy, slouching makes you look sad and moody, makes you look older, and keeps your Woman Energy from radiating out to others. Slouching can actually affect your chemistry and cause you to become depressed. Plus, standing tall makes your breasts look perky.
Smiling and standing straight has a great effect on your mood and outlook on life. If you don’t believe me, try this experiment:
Sit with your eyes closed. Let your shoulders droop, slump your posture, relax your face, and let your mouth drop. Notice how you feel? Next, with eyes still closed, lift your shoulders, raise your chest, lift your chin, and smile all the way up to your eyes. Put everything you’ve got into that big beautiful smile.
Feel the difference? Do this a couple of times, trading between frowning and slumping then back to smiling with joy, with your shoulders back, your posture tall and you’ll experience how every different each feels. It literally changes your chemistry.
That’s your beauty potion being stirred with a very big spoon. Smiling creates endorphins within you. So does good posture. You’ve heard of endorphins. They’re a group of peptide hormones that bind to opiate receptors. They give you a natural high, and cause you to feel more elated, with an immediate sense of well-being. If that isn’t magic, I don’t know what is.
Assignment: Play with your smile and your posture this week. Pay close attention and notice how you feel. If you are not feeling your best, check your posture. I can almost guarantee it will not be tall, proud, and straight.
And smile often and notice how you feel. And practice working your magic by smiling at others, watching how they respond. You are a maker of magic…so don’t ever forget that.
“I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.”Woody Allen
Since smiling is good for your mood and helps you glow more brightly, you can probably guess that laughing creates even more endorphins! When you laugh you exercise many muscles throughout your body, your immune system is stimulated, and you get a real energy boost.
Laughter is a great way to share your joy of life, your positive energy, and your magic with everyone you meet. It helps put people at ease, and most everyone wants to join in when they hear laughter. Haven’t you been out and when a group begins to laugh, you find you want to go find out what they’re laughing about, and to participate? It’s infectious.
If you’re someone who laughs easily, people will want to be around you because you’re fun and vibrant. What’s the point of being beautiful if you’re no fun to be with? Fun people are like magnets!
So make more time for laughter. Grab a girlfriend or your husband or boyfriend and go to a funny movie. Let your hair down and be kids again. Laugh like two year olds!
If you have a comedy club in your community organize a group of friends to share in some laughter. Kick off for a day and go and play! Find the happiness in your friendships and plug in to the profound sense of joy in being with people with whom you can be yourself. Love life and laugh!
And don’t forget the power of jokes to uplift yourself and others. This is all about being fun and attractive and infusing people with your energy and lust for life. When you do that, you’re making magic.
Learning a few funny jokes taps into your playfulness. When you’re playful and become energized, you laugh more and often. So learn a couple of great jokes. They can be cute, or even a bit off-color in a cute way, but should never be crass or insulting. That’s tasteless and will detract from your beauty. Plus, you don’t ever want to make people feel uncomfortable.
If you’re not a joke teller, you need to practice a few times by yourself. Tell it in front of a mirror and get your delivery just right. Then, when the opportunity presents itself (you’ll know), jump in with your joke. I can go for an hour telling jokes and trust me, it always causes magic to happen because laughter is one of the most magical things that can happen to a group of people.
Men are more likely to be funny so if you just don’t feel comfortable telling jokes, then just be good at laughing more easily.
And what about the way you laugh? Do you like how you laugh or is it obnoxious, too loud, or a cackle. I had lunch with a man a while back and he said he’d gone out with a woman he liked a lot, but he stopped seeing her because he couldn’t stand her laugh, and was always embarrassed when he was out with her. It turned out I knew the woman and had to agree with his assessment.
You can actually change your laugh with some practice. You want an infectious laugh because you’ll be able to make real magic. One of the most endearing qualities about Julia Robers is her all-out, eye-sparkling, full-bodied laugh.
Assignment: Learn a couple of jokes so when you get the chance, you’ll be prepared to make a little magic. If that isn’t comfortable for you, find a few funny videos and put them on your favorites list on your smart phone. Then, when the opportunity presents itself, you can share one or two.
I considered becoming a stand-up comedian for a while, so I took some classes. You can see my performance at the Comedy Store on Sunset Blvd in Los Angeles here (if you’re offended by the ‘F’ word, which my teacher encouraged, then you might not want to watch: Kara At the Comedy Store
“Sing like nobody’s listening.”
— Mark Twain
So what if you have a voice like a screeching cat — who cares! And you don’t have a voice like Susan Boyle — again, who cares? When was the last time you took a deep breath and launched into a song just for the pleasure of it…simply because singing made you feel good?
I’m not suggesting you rush out and join a choir — unless it would make you happy, of course! But listen to people you meet every day who sing to themselves. The delivery man, the garage mechanic, the woman in love with life and singing down the street. Sing along with the radio. With a Smart Phone, you can have your favorite sing-along songs with you all the time. Sing as yo get ready in the morning or when you clean up at night.
It isn’t about anyone else hearing you. It’s about changing your energy from the inside out. It’s about raising the amperage of your Glow Flow and your Woman Energy. And when you learn to do that whenever you want, it’s about you making magic. Choose your time and place and sing.
Assignment: Pick a favorite song. Notice your energy. Start singing, full out, and then notice how you feel. See, you know how to make magic, don’t you?
“Without music life would be a mistake.”– Nietzsche
Is there a musician inside of you…waiting for when you have more time? You don’t have to play at Carnegie Hall to enjoy making music. Perhaps there’s an instrument you haven’t played in years. Why did it get left behind? Did life get too busy? Did you think, Well, I couldn’t play that well anyway?” Do you miss the pleasure of creating sound and rhythm? If so, what’s keeping you from such joy?
Maybe you’ve been saying for years, “Some day I’m going to take piano lessons.” (Or whatever the instrument is.) Well, guess what? Some day is here.
Without music and rhythm we start stiffening up a little. We forget to bend and sway with life and we don’t take notice of the natural beat of living. Maybe you don’t have an interest in making music, but do you like watching others perform? Seeing and feeling music being made life is not the same as listening to a recording. That’s good, of course. But life performance gives you all the other elements that are part of the magic…feeling their energy, their love of what they’re doing, seeing their bodies move.
Living and loving is all about connecting to our primal energy…the magic that infuses you with light and joy, sharing your Woman Energy with another? That’s a beautiful thing because it brings out your natural beauty.
Assignment: If you used to play an instrument and miss it, or if you’ve always wanted to take music lessons, what’s holding you back? Think about adding the magic of making music to your life.
“A child who does not play is not a hcild, but a man who does not play has lost forever the child who lived in him.”
— Pablo Neruda
What do you do for playtime? Excuse me? Did you say you’re too old? NO WAY!!! If you can’t let yourself play, then none of the lessons in this course will really work. Having a sense of play makes every task more pleasurable.
When did you stop playing? About the time you became a self-conscious teenager? That’s a long time to go without play.
Sadly, as we get older, we get more serious. Too serious, in my opinion. Stop for a moment and think: How would you add play to your life? What comes to mind? Has it been so long that you’re drawing a blank? Well, here are a few suggestions:
- Get out your old hula-hoop
- Roll around on the floor with your dog
- Get down on the floor with your or your friends kids
- Hang out at a playground and offer to push the merry-go-round
If you’re not comfortable being silly, practice in private until it becomes a part of you like it used to be, however long ago that was. Or maybe you’ve been secretly wishing you could let loose.
Make a list of playful things you used to do or would like to do. What about a water slide park? Maybe in-line skating? Or horseback riding? Why not plan a trip you’ve always wanted to take? Fly to Rome or drive to Texas.
Go on a cruise and be the woman you’ve always wanted to be. No one will know you’re not a flamboyant woman who’s so filled with life that you infect everyone on the cruise with your joy and thrill of being alive! They won’t know you’re pretending. Pretend long enough and anything you want to be becomes a reality.
If you’ve ever read Julia Cameron’s “The Artist’s Way” you’ll be familiar with her wonderful ideas for keeping in touch with your playful, creative self. I recommend you book yourself a time on a regular basis when you go off and have some fun, or do something you love doing. It will recharge your batteries and let you feel and enrich your Spirit and Soul. When you make time for yourself to have fun and enjoy life, you are making magic for yourself and anyone who is inspired to feel playful, too.
You can make it happen. If you bring out the child in you enough, you already know that it will impact your appearance in a very positive way. See, you have lots of ways to make magic.
Learning to be playful again will cause your eyes to be brighter, your cheeks rosier, and you’ll look younger (without Botox or google-eyed plastic surgery.) What’s the worst that can happen? You might get embarrassed? So what! No one ever died of embarrassment. Besides, anyone who judges a happy person needs a little playfulness in their life, don’t you think?
Assignment: Come up with some ways to be playful, then, go have some fun. If it’s uncomfortable, practice by yourself until it’s easy. When you are able to let your child come out and play, the magic you’re feeling inside will help others let their magic making ability awaken.
“Yeah, I flirt. I’m not blind and I’m not dead!”Dolly Parton
Flirting? Sure! Flirting lets you use your beauty, magnetism, and your Woman Energy to boldly impact those around you. The kind of flirting I’m talking about has nothing to do with being sexy. It’s not about stealing someone’s husband or boyfriend, or making other women uneasy.
What I mean is flirting by simply having fun with everyone you meet. I call it Friendly Flirting. Flirt with the waitperson by being playful with them. Tease the check-out lady so you get her smiling or laughing. What about the UPS man, the old lady or man who walks by every day, and of course, little kids.
Flirting is simply a fun way to play with people. To get them to smile, and raise their energy. When you can do that, you’re like Tinkerbell, making magic everywhere you go. So go ahead, tease, make a quick joke, get them to smile and laugh. You’ll have fun and so will everyone with whom you interact. It really is making magic.
Offering playful acts of kindness and fun make you feel happy and can instantly brighten the mood of every person you choose to flirt with. And think about this: If you raise the spirits of someone who will be interacting with people all day, how many others might be impacted by your one act of Friendly Flirting? Could be hundreds, even thousands if every person then goes out and lifts the spirits of the people they meet. That’s pretty magical stuff, isn’t it?
Assignment: If you’re not already a naturally flirtatious person (in the Friendly Flirting way), make a list of ways you can play with people. Watch what other people do if it’s not comfortable or natural for you. Then, before you head out the door, look at your list and pick just one thing to do with as many people as you can. See how you feel at the end of the day. I suspect you will feel energized, full of life, and magical.