Now that you have your list of wounding memories, you will organize them into similar memories. Then you will come up with a name for each group. Those are your Sub-Personalities. By naming them, you will become more easily aware when they try to take over, which will allow you to choose to respond the way YOU want, taking the power from your inner puppeteer.
You’ve now discovered your Core Wounding and, in asking the questions in the 7th Class assignment, you now understand what you told yourself about yourself, your Core Belief.
Knowing this, you should be able to see how that belief about yourself has impacted your life…the choices and decisions you’ve made, how you’ve responded to men, and why your relationships are the way they are.
If you’re not happy about any of that, now is the time to start making some real changes, at the cellular level.
Now You Can See More Clearly
You now have a different view of your life, don’t you? Does it feel a bit like you’ve stepped behind a veil that has obscured what has been going on behind the scenes?
Knowing how your Core Wounding has impacted your life, you can now understand why you’ve wondered, “Why did I do (or say) that? Why did I make that choice, even when I know it was not a good idea at the time?” Everything makes more sense, doesn’t it?
So now, you have a direction from which to move forward on this fascinating journey toward living in the light of your most authentic self. With each passing week you will feel a new habit of awareness, a new habit of blossoming Feminine Grace.
Assignment #1
Discovering Your Sub-Personalities
Since your child-self began to construct your Program, it is has been controlling your life. You’ve been unaware that this has been going on, because it has always been unconscious, until now.
You have seen how your Core Wounding has colored your life. Now it’s time to unearth the various parts of your Program, so you can have even more control over how they impact your day-do-day life.
In last week’s assignment, you grouped similar charged experienced. That means, the feelings were the same, not necessarily the actual experience. An example is embarrassment. It can happen in a variety of ways, but in each experience, the feeling is embarrassment.
Select a group of charged memories you wish to work with. I would suggest the most charged, but it’s really up to you.
On a piece of paper, or a page in your journal, make a note with just a few words to remind you which memory each is.
Sit with your list. Allow yourself to feel what those charged memories feel like. Ask yourself what that younger version of you told herself about herself. If you need to put yourself in a light meditation, go ahead and do that.
Can you see how that’s not really true about you? That you just made that up? And can you see how that self-belief has held you back?
Now this next step is really important. I want you to make up a name for this sub-personality. Make it light or even funny so when you think of it, it lightens your spirit, rather than pulling it down.
An example I’ve shared for one of mine is, “Wrong Sweater Kara.” One that my ex-husband had was, “Flashlight Harvey,” because his dad and big brother were always working together on projects and because Harvey was much younger, he could only hold the flashlight. It made him feel left out and caused him to want to find some way to impress his dad.
When he did this process he could see that all his adult life he worked for men he tried to impress, and always falling short because in his mind, no matter how good he was, and how successful, he was never as good as he thought he should be.
So take the time to group your charged experience by the emotions they elicit, then feel those feelings they bring up, and finally, name that group.
Once you have the names of your primary sub-personalities, whenever any one of them tries to cause you to react in a less than empowering or ‘ugly’ way, remind yourself that it’s only “Name of Sub-Personality” trying to control you in an effort for that little girl way back when trying to keep you safe and get your needs met.
Once you become good at this, it’s actually kind of fun to ‘catch yourself’ being triggered by a sub-personality. If any of your sub-personalities causes strife between you and someone you care about, especially your romantic partner, you might want to explain what that sub-personality is all about and that your goal is for it to stop controlling your reactions and responses.
Assignment #2
Recreation Meditation
Now that you have a kind of map of your Program, it’s time to take those old beliefs about yourself and turn them around so your self-beliefs become what’s REALLY true about you.
This is a very sweet guided visualization because it is filled with so much love for the little girl you once were. She will be acknowledge for helping you stay safe and you can give her what she needs.
When you’re done with this meditation, stay quiet and make notes in your journal about your experience and what you feel.
Assignment #3
What Is Your Truth
Have a 3×5 card with you, or something more solid than paper with you for this assignment.
After you’ve done the Recreation Meditation, go to a mirror and looking directly into your eyes, state the truth about you.
And example might be, “I’m Joyce, and I’m okay just the way I am.” Or, “I’m Susan and I am loveable.”
This statement should be positive, in present tense. Eliminate qualifiers like may or might. Use ‘I’, not ‘you.’ Make it positive; use “I’m good,” instead of, “I’m not bad.” And make it present tense; use ‘I am,’ not ‘I will.’
Write this new belief on a card, using positive, present tense language.
What you have now is a Personal Affirmation, one that is a re-creation of your Core Belief that came from your Core Wounding. Because this new phrase is specific to your experience, in your language, and not just something you pull out of thin air, it is the most effective and powerful tool you can use for your personal growth.
As you have now learned, those core beliefs are the drivers of your Program. All those things you told yourself about yourself when you were small have kept you from what’s really true about you.
Affirming your Truth and recreating your Core Beliefs that surround each of your Sub-Personalities will automatically open the way for living in Feminine Grace so you can create the life you want.
Remember this: Those old beliefs and decisions have been keeping you safe and that means it will take some practice before the new beliefs feel right.
By re-creating your beliefs in a deeply relaxed state, with yourself and your Inner Wise Woman there with that child, you are working with your subconscious mind, where they reside.
In order to make your Truth real, you will want to repeat the Recreation Meditation until you can experience it as true in your body, with no feelings of hesitation or doubt.
There is nothing more important for your future happiness that you could do for yourself. You are worthy of the time it requires to bring your Truth to the surface, so you can enjoy your Woman Energy, and live in an habitual state of Feminine Grace.